Post by Legolas on Mar 9, 2004 20:17:15 GMT -5
Elrond has gone to the dark side *nod nod*
Frodo has arrived in Rivendell and has been revived. Elrond is sitting on a perfectly designed chair, in a perfectly designed room, going over his perfectly designed plan. Rivendell is a place of light but around Elrond is shadow.
Elrond: For to long has Sauron been the focus of the noble, it is Sauron they fear, Sauron who they all prepare to defeat, but no longer once the ring is destroyed, and my life long rival taken with it, they will let their guard down, they will think that their trouble is all over, but compared to me Sauron will have been only a warm up, Elrond will soon be ruler of earth. Muhahahahahaha
The unsuspecting, men, elves, dwarves, wizards and hobbit go to the council and wait for a man they all trust will do all he can to end the war with Sauron. Elrond enters.
Elrond: Men of Middle-Earth, we have gathered today for a purpose…
Legolas: Well duh…
Elrond: Legolas, didn’t your father ever teach you to respect your elders.
Legolas: Come off it your, only like what, 200 years older than me.
Elrond: I’ve fought in more wars than you!
Legolas: I’m better looking!
Elrond: I’m smarter!
Legolas: Yeah right!
Gandalf: YOU’LL ALL BE DESTROYED!!!
Elrond realizes he has gotten very worked up, he can’t let that happen it could ruin everything, he decide to use Gandalf’s random comment to break up the argument, and takes a mental note to add Legolas to his hit list.
Elrond: Thank you Gandalf, we are here today to discuss the fate of Middle-Earth, bring forth the ring Frodo…Frodo? Frodo stop staring into space and pay attention.
Frodo: Oh, I’m so sorry, I was just thinking of all the time I used to spend wishing I was off with Bilbo, off on one of his adventures, but my own adventure...
Elrond: OK, we didn’t want your life story, just bring-forth-the-ring-Fro-do
Frodo hobbles up and places the ring.
Boromir: So it is true.
Gandalf: Yep
Boromir: Well I think Gondor should get it.
Aragorn: How come?
Boromir: Well, MY FATHER keeps Mordor at bay, and MY FATHER is the steward of Gondor.
Aragorn: But not the king?
Boromir: Gondor doesn’t want a king
Aragorn: You asked Gondor?
Boromir: Well...
Aragorn: Did you say “Gondor, do you want a king?”
Boromir: No...but I don’t want one, and I always get what I want because MY FATHER...
Elrond: Is the steward of Gondor? For crying out loud we know! OK, I’m just going to say what I want to say before anymore petty arguments start. I want someone to go destroy the ring and want eight people to go with him.
Gimli: Why eight?
Elrond: Because I said so, that’s why! Who would care to help the ring bearer?
All hands go up. Noble idiots thinks Elrond.
Elrond: Good I’ll decide who goes later. Now who wants to be the ringbearer.
Only Boromir's hand rises.
Boromir: I want to show it to my father...
Elrond: Anyone else?
Boromir: Pick me!!! MY FATHER...
Elrond: Anyone at all?
Frodo’s hand rises slowly.
Frodo: I will take the ring to Mordor, though...
Elrond: Fine! Frodo! Take it and go!
Boromir: What? The Hobbit? Humph if my father knew.
Sam, Merry and Pippin run into the room and chorus:
Sam, Merry and Pippin: We will go with you Mr. Frodo!!
Later on Elrond is back in his room discussing the remaining Fellowship members. Elrond will send people who he wants to get rid of. With the help of his e-vile assistant, he will select people.
Elrond: The stupid hobbits took up valuable hit list names, darn them, but I guess we are better of with out them.
e-vile Guy: Lets look at the list hmmmm, Glorifindel, Gildor, Galadriel, Gandalf...
Elrond: Gandalf, add him, he’s a threat.
e-vile Guy: The others are too…
Elrond: Don’t doubt my wisdom. Add Legolas. He was foolish to confront me
e-vile Guy: Gandalf, Legolas, Gimli?
Elrond: Why?
e-vile Guy: I have my reasons!
Elrond: Fine. Add Aragorn.
e-vile Guy: But you raised him like a son!!!
Elrond: He is messing around with my daughter!
e-vile Guy: Fair enough. Only one slot left.
Elrond: Boromir. He never shuts up about his father. My father this, my father that...personally I think his Dad sounds like a nutter...but we will make sure that he doesn’t disappoint his father. Muhahahahahahaha
e-vile Guy: Hahahahahahaha
Elrond: Muhahahahahahahahahaha
Frodo has arrived in Rivendell and has been revived. Elrond is sitting on a perfectly designed chair, in a perfectly designed room, going over his perfectly designed plan. Rivendell is a place of light but around Elrond is shadow.
Elrond: For to long has Sauron been the focus of the noble, it is Sauron they fear, Sauron who they all prepare to defeat, but no longer once the ring is destroyed, and my life long rival taken with it, they will let their guard down, they will think that their trouble is all over, but compared to me Sauron will have been only a warm up, Elrond will soon be ruler of earth. Muhahahahahaha
The unsuspecting, men, elves, dwarves, wizards and hobbit go to the council and wait for a man they all trust will do all he can to end the war with Sauron. Elrond enters.
Elrond: Men of Middle-Earth, we have gathered today for a purpose…
Legolas: Well duh…
Elrond: Legolas, didn’t your father ever teach you to respect your elders.
Legolas: Come off it your, only like what, 200 years older than me.
Elrond: I’ve fought in more wars than you!
Legolas: I’m better looking!
Elrond: I’m smarter!
Legolas: Yeah right!
Gandalf: YOU’LL ALL BE DESTROYED!!!
Elrond realizes he has gotten very worked up, he can’t let that happen it could ruin everything, he decide to use Gandalf’s random comment to break up the argument, and takes a mental note to add Legolas to his hit list.
Elrond: Thank you Gandalf, we are here today to discuss the fate of Middle-Earth, bring forth the ring Frodo…Frodo? Frodo stop staring into space and pay attention.
Frodo: Oh, I’m so sorry, I was just thinking of all the time I used to spend wishing I was off with Bilbo, off on one of his adventures, but my own adventure...
Elrond: OK, we didn’t want your life story, just bring-forth-the-ring-Fro-do
Frodo hobbles up and places the ring.
Boromir: So it is true.
Gandalf: Yep
Boromir: Well I think Gondor should get it.
Aragorn: How come?
Boromir: Well, MY FATHER keeps Mordor at bay, and MY FATHER is the steward of Gondor.
Aragorn: But not the king?
Boromir: Gondor doesn’t want a king
Aragorn: You asked Gondor?
Boromir: Well...
Aragorn: Did you say “Gondor, do you want a king?”
Boromir: No...but I don’t want one, and I always get what I want because MY FATHER...
Elrond: Is the steward of Gondor? For crying out loud we know! OK, I’m just going to say what I want to say before anymore petty arguments start. I want someone to go destroy the ring and want eight people to go with him.
Gimli: Why eight?
Elrond: Because I said so, that’s why! Who would care to help the ring bearer?
All hands go up. Noble idiots thinks Elrond.
Elrond: Good I’ll decide who goes later. Now who wants to be the ringbearer.
Only Boromir's hand rises.
Boromir: I want to show it to my father...
Elrond: Anyone else?
Boromir: Pick me!!! MY FATHER...
Elrond: Anyone at all?
Frodo’s hand rises slowly.
Frodo: I will take the ring to Mordor, though...
Elrond: Fine! Frodo! Take it and go!
Boromir: What? The Hobbit? Humph if my father knew.
Sam, Merry and Pippin run into the room and chorus:
Sam, Merry and Pippin: We will go with you Mr. Frodo!!
Later on Elrond is back in his room discussing the remaining Fellowship members. Elrond will send people who he wants to get rid of. With the help of his e-vile assistant, he will select people.
Elrond: The stupid hobbits took up valuable hit list names, darn them, but I guess we are better of with out them.
e-vile Guy: Lets look at the list hmmmm, Glorifindel, Gildor, Galadriel, Gandalf...
Elrond: Gandalf, add him, he’s a threat.
e-vile Guy: The others are too…
Elrond: Don’t doubt my wisdom. Add Legolas. He was foolish to confront me
e-vile Guy: Gandalf, Legolas, Gimli?
Elrond: Why?
e-vile Guy: I have my reasons!
Elrond: Fine. Add Aragorn.
e-vile Guy: But you raised him like a son!!!
Elrond: He is messing around with my daughter!
e-vile Guy: Fair enough. Only one slot left.
Elrond: Boromir. He never shuts up about his father. My father this, my father that...personally I think his Dad sounds like a nutter...but we will make sure that he doesn’t disappoint his father. Muhahahahahahaha
e-vile Guy: Hahahahahahaha
Elrond: Muhahahahahahahahahaha
